Establishing Good Parent Relationships
Parents are interested in what you do for their child while they are in your care. You should work closely with parents so that their child grows and learns in your childcare program and at home. Establishing a partnership with parents will ensure the continuous growth and development of their children. Warm, positive interactions between teachers and family members are also ways to show children that families are important. There is a Building Partnerships with Parents Workshop PP 85-88 in A TRAINER’S GUIDE TO CREATIVE CURRICULUM FOR FAMILY CHILDCARE. This is a great resource to use when you are trying to establish a relationship with your parents. The following are also good resources for you to use to promote good parent relationships in your program.
Getting off to a good start with parents:
o Learn parent’s names.
o Make a good impression.
o Express your goals and procedures in a clear, simple way.
o Share information about yourself (education, background, where you grew up, etc…).
o Speak from a parent’s point of view if applicable i.e.… talking about your own child.
o Share your curriculum with parents so that they see you as a professional with goals for their children. Let them see that you know how children learn and develop. They will appreciate and respect you when they realize that you are more than a babysitter.
o Establish separation and reunion rituals so that the child and the parents become familiar with your routine.
o Express goals for your program.
· Will provide opportunities to grow socially, physically, and emotionally.
· Will help develop problem-solving skills.
· Will encourage expansion of child’s vocabulary.
· Will instill an interest in the world around the child.
· Will teach self-discipline skills such as learning to obey rules, respecting others, etc…
· Will promote the use of large and small muscles.
· Will increase the child’s attention span.
o Write a personal letter to the parents. Your letter should include the following:
· Promise to treat their child the way you would want your own to be treated.
· Explain to the parents that you have an important job that you do not intend to take lightly.
· Tell the parent that you look forward to working with them and their child.
· Tell the parent that you intend to provide their child with the best opportunities to become a successful learner.
· Promise to protect and love their child.
· There is also an example of a great parent letter on page 57 of CREATIVE CURRICULUM FOR FAMILY CHILD CARE.
Once you and the parents have developed a close relationship with one another, the following suggestions help maintain your partnership:
o Use thank you cards when needed.
o Let parents know how great you think their child is on a regular basis. Show a sense of pride in their child.
o Ask for parent’s advice or opinions on various matters that concern your child care program.
o Maintain confidentiality.
o Be a good listener.
o Look up and acknowledge parents and their child everyday as they arrive.
o Carefully differentiate between parenting roles and teaching roles i.e.… when sharing an emergence of new skills, deciding when to start toilet training, or establishing strategies for sleeping habits.
o Help parents develop self-confidence in their own parenting styles.
o Increase the parent’s understanding of their child’s development.
o Enhance parenting skills so they are able to support child’s increasing developmental concepts.
o Empower parents to make good parenting decisions and choices.
o Connect parents to resources.
Sometimes parents may show signs of disapproval from your program. This can cause a breakdown in parent relationships very quickly if not resolved. The following are ways to spot problems when there is a breakdown in the parent/provider relationship (Warning Signals):
· Drop off and pick up child without stopping to chat.
· Body language shows coldness, formality, or irritation.
· Handouts are not picked up.
· No participation in scheduled workshops, meetings, or projects.
If you notice any of these warning signs happening between you and the parent, try to work things out as soon as possible.
Parents are the child’s first and most important teachers. Participation in their child’s school experience is crucial for the child’s development and for the parent’s learning. They learn by watching you and getting ideas from you. When you involve parents in your program, you are teaching them important elements that encourage the growth and development of their child. Plan, implement, and evaluate parent participation experiences on a daily basis. The following are a list of activities and ideas that promote the involvement of parents in your program:
o Set up a pre-enrollment visit for the family to see your program and get a glimpse of what the day will be like.
o Set up a family interview to meet all of the family members and to talk about your program.
o Conduct a gradual enrollment with the child and include the parents in the beginning.
o Strengthen the school and home connection by providing a list of things that parents can do at home that you do at school.
o Have parents on tape telling a story, reading a book, singing a song, or just talking to children.
o Make and display an Apple Tree Wish List. - Make a large tree and place apples all over it. On each apple, write a wish such as supply donations needed, a community visitor needed, etc… Display the tree in your parent’s resource center and encourage them to take an apple and make a wish happen. You can put a small magnet on the back of each apple so the parents can keep it on the refrigerator as a reminder.
o Encourage parents to stay and have breakfast in the morning with the children.
o Invite parents to visit and share their abilities.
o Host a family night supper.
o Parents can collect materials such as fabric scraps, dress up clothes, empty containers, etc… for your program.
o Ask parents for help with projects such as building or making things for your program.
o Parents can help plan special occasions such as birthdays or Christmas parties.
o Encourage parents to join their child for lunch.
o Provide parent meetings or conferences on a regular basis.
o Ask parents to send in photos of family members and display them around the house.
o Photograph parents and their child together in your house to display.
o Provide parent education classes on various topics.
o Ask parents to have pictures made of themselves at work. Have a “parents at work” photo album so that you can talk with the child about what their parents do while they are at school.
o Have a “meet the parent’s night” when a new child joins your program.
o Schedule a Family Picnic on a nice day.
o Parents can participate in a Toy Swap. They bring in old toys in good condition to trade with one another. This can also be done with a Book Exchange.
o Parents can make a Video Diary of themselves for their children to watch.
o Coupon Exchange- Parents bring in coupons that they do not use for other parents to use.
o Different parents can come and read to all of the children in your program.
o Parent Book Recordings – For the parents that are unable to come and read to the children, you can provide them the opportunity to read a book on tape. You show the pages of the book as they read.
o Have a Movie Day for parents and children. Provide popcorn and juice.
o Make Tie Snakes with Dad’s Ties. Have dad’s send in old ties and stuff them with paper. Children can pretend play with them.
o Plan a Happy Hour (songs and refreshments) for parents and children at the end of a long week.
o Have Muffins for Moms on Mother’s Day. Ask mom’s to join their child for muffins.
o Have Doughnuts for Dad on Father’s Day. Ask dad’s to join their child for doughnuts.
o Have a Bubble Party one day during the summer.
As parents visit your classroom, ask them to sign a visitor’s log. This allows you to keep a record of the parents who are involved in your program. A Parent Visitor Log can be found on page 434 of THE COMPREHENSIVE INFANT CURRICULUM.
True partners depend on good communication. Communicating with parents and involving them reduces concerns they may have about you and your program. Communicate regularly with parents about their child’s experiences and use a variety of techniques to keep communication flowing.
Talking daily eliminates misunderstandings and makes communication easier. Arrange times to talk. Be sure to let parents know when it is a good time to call you to talk. When talking to parents, focus on positive things.
Ways to Communicate:
· Share a special event that occurred with parents.
· Communicate/talk to parents daily.
· Send home daily messages or notes giving parents information about their child. Include information such as their nap schedule, eating habits, play time, etc,,,
· Greet parents by name everyday.
· Provide newsletters containing weekly news and activities.
· Tell parents about how you are teaching their child to develop self-help skills.
· Share activities/ideas children like to do.
· Conduct Workshops on the following topics:
o Toilet Training
o Getting Ready for School
o Bed Wetting
o Thumb/Finger Sucking
o Behavior Problems
o Separation Anxiety
o Learning to Talk
o Growth and Development
o Spotting Problems
o Activities to do at Home
· Have meetings/conferences on a regular basis to discuss child’s development or behavior problems.
· Ways to discuss Developmental Growth:
o Daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, or semi-annual written notes
o Conferences
o Conversations
o Posting developmental banners
o Sharing children’s work
· Consult with parents when behavior problems arise. Strategies for a problem solving conference:
o Agree on problem
o Describe behavior
o Get parents observations and ideas
o Discuss possible causes
o Agree on goals
o Discuss strategies for reaching goals
o Agree on a strategy
o Keep in Contact
· Talk to parents about what their child enjoys doing at home, how they spend their time at home, any important changes that the child has undergone, or important people in their lives.
· Regularly consult with parents about child’s favorite books, foods, trips, activities, etc…
· Provide a Weekly Calendar that shows the following:
o Skills and Concepts to be Learned
o Activities for Each Day of the Week
· Provide a Daily Newsletter telling the following:
o What We Did…
o Where We Went…
o Just For Fun…
o Tomorrow…
o My New Friends…
· Have an Injury Report filled out when accidents occur.
· Provide parents with an Attitude Update. Be sure to include comments about the following:
o Getting Along With Others
o Courteous and Cooperative
o Self-Control
o Respect for Others
o Cares for Personal Property
o Assumes Responsibility for Actions
· Have suggestions of activities for parents to do home.
· Discuss child’s individual goals on as needed basis.
· Report to Parents about Materials needed:
o Put in a Newsletter
o Apple Wish Tree
o Post on a Bulletin Board
· Write notes when a parent can’t be reached.
· Keep a journal on each child that can be passed back and forth from their home and your program.
· After each activity in CREATIVE CURRICULUM FOR FCC, there are great parent letters explaining the activities you did with the children and why. There are also suggestions of things to do at home.
· Send Postcards as interest is shown or as developmental issues arise. These are letters to parents written in a postcard format. A multitude of cards and topics can be found in THE COMPREHENSIVE INFANT CURRICULUM. Postcards can be sent more than once. Repetition assures that parents will have more than one opportunity to gain an understanding of the information. You can also refresh a parent’s memory as issues can arise repeatedly.
· Supplement sending postcards with articles, ideas, and information from other sources.
· Keep a daily folder to send information back and forth.
· Keep an Anecdotal Note Calendar in the child’s daily folder.
· Post a Walking Chart for parents to see.
· Leave a place for notes from parents/provider on the sign in sheet.
· A sample Communication Sheet can be found on page 429 of THE COMPREHENSIVE INFANT CURRIUCULUM.
· A sample Anecdotal Record Form can be found on page 428 of THE COMPREHENSIVE INFANT CURRIUCULUM.
When meeting new parents, there are several ways you can communicate important information.
· Schedule a meeting with new parents and discuss the following:
o Questions they have for you.
o Arrival and departure times for the child.
o Tips for making separation easier.
o What you and the parent will supply (food, diapers, change of clothes, etc…).
o How many meals and snacks the child will receive.
o Names and ages of other adults or older children that may interact with the children from time to time.
o Holidays and Vacations when child care is not provided.
o Your approach to Childcare.
o Your Policies and Procedures: Put them in writing and provide a copy to guard against possible misunderstandings.
Ø Fees and Payment Schedule.
Ø Termination policy.
Ø Hours of operation.
Ø Illness and Emergency procedures.
Ø How parents notify you if their child is ill.
Ø How you will notify parents if you are ill, and who is responsible for back up care (you or parents). Provide the name and background of the individual who will provide back up for you.
Ø Bringing toys policy.
Ø Birthday policy.
Ø Articles of clothing needed for changing clothes.
· Interview the parent and obtain the following information about their child:
o Name of child’s doctor or clinic.
o Information on child’s likes and dislikes, eating habits, sleeping habits, fears, favorite toys or activities, etc…
o Who will be bring and picking up child, including a list of those who can also pick up.
o Any allergies and what to do.
o Authorization to give medicines if needed.
o Ask about parenting styles
o Discuss expectations
· Provide a questionnaire for the parents to fill out. Include the following:
o Full name of child
o Date of Birth
o Mother and father’s name and occupation
o Marital Status
o Custody/Visitation arrangements
o List of siblings and ages
o What time to bed, wake up, and nap
o Special fears
o Vision or hearing problems
o Medical problems
o Food or drinks not to have
o Chicken pox
o Other illnesses
o Serious operations or accidents
o Method of behavior control at home
o Any pets
o Goals for your program
· Give a packet of information to new parents including the following items:
o Parent information sheet and child questionnaire to be filled out.
o Handbook of policies, procedures, philosophy, etc…
o List of supplies needed.
o Blank photo album to fill with pictures of family.
o Letter to parents.
o Curriculum information.
o Schedule of how program operates.
o Your philosophy.
o Your approaches to meal time, toilet training/diapering, etc…
You should have a special area set up for sharing information with parents. This area of the house should be close to the door that the parents use. Make the area seem inviting by placing flowers on table. It should be a bright area filled with an abundance of information for parents to read. You may even want to provide breakfast in the morning (coffee and muffins/doughnuts) near the sign in sheet for parents to enjoy.
Some ideas for your parent resource center:
· Sign in sheet for parents or visitors.
o Flashcards
o Games
o Books
o Parent take home folders with information (articles, latest recalls, etc…)
o Check out sheet for items taken
· Call state offices and agencies and get free materials on childcare topics.
· Place a large bulletin board in your resource center and post information for parents to see. Bulletin Board Ideas:
o Current information about your program
o Activity centers for the week
o Parent education classes available
o Fun things to do at home or in community
o Child Care News
o Menu
o Special Notes or Messages
o Helpful handouts
o Notices
o Lost and Found
o Child’s Art
o Newsletters
o Calendars
o Display pictures of children
o Apple Tree Wish List
· Have a place to pick up artwork or dirty clothes that need to go home.
· Provide copies of the coming week's schedule/menus.
· Have a Message Center.
· Post Fee Reminders.
· Place permission slip forms near the sign in sheet for walking trips or transporting children when needed.
· Provide boxes or message pockets for each child for art, clothing, messages, etc…
· Have Copies of your Childcare Handbook for parents to view or take.
· Develop a brochure about your program and place it in center.
You should have a designated place for your resources as well. This area should contain a desk or table for keeping up with paperwork. Other items or ideas for your resource center are:
· Emergency contact numbers, parent information, medical information, etc… for each individual child.
· Contact Numbers
· Resource books and magazines
· Telephone
· Paperwork
· Finances
· Files
· Lesson Plans
· Materials
Sources
Albrecht, Kay; Miller, Linda G., The Comprehensive Infant Curriculum. Gryphon House, Inc., 2000.
Corum, Beth, Be The Best You Can Be. Wray Graphics, 1997.
Cryer, Debbie; Harms, Thelma; Ray, Adele Richardson, The Active Learning Series. Addison-Wesley Publishing Company, Inc., 1996
Dodge, Diane T.; Cloker, Laura J., The Creative Curriculum for Early Childhood. Teaching Strategies, Inc., 2001.
Dodge, Diane T.; Cloker, Laura J., The Creative Curriculum for Family Child Care. Teaching Strategies, Inc., 2001.
Murphy, Sharon, The Mailbox Superbook Grade1. The Education Center, Inc. 1998.
Schiller, Pam; Phipps, Pat; The Complete Daily Curriculum For Early Childhood. Gryphon House, Inc., 2002.
